Wherein I Talk About Who’s Pulling Your Strings? by Harriet B. Braiker, Ph.D.

I just finished reading a helpful book on how people can and will manipulate others. Dr. Braiker helps the reader discover if he or she is an easy mark for manipulators, and teaches how to discern how the manipulator will try to make you do, feel or act the way that he or she wants. She finishes up by giving strategies for dealing with one’s weaknesses and how to stay several steps ahead of any manipulators in one’s life.

Anyone who grew up in an unhealthy household, or anyone who interacts with manipulators should consider buying or borrowing a copy of this book. This excerpt that describes manipulative behavior is worth the price of the book all by itself:

“Both fear and anxiety are easily conditioned….”

“/Guilt/ is a uniquely human emotion. It is the result of feeling /excessively/ responsible for the emotions and/or experiences of others…a skilled manipulator can send you on a rocket-propelled guilt trip for a destination of capitulation and compliance.”

…The manipulator may cry, sulk, pout, or play the victim or martyr. She may complain of stress-related physical pains and problems for which you are somehow responsible because you have done something–or failed to do something–that has caused the manipulator to become emotionally upset….

…. Once a manipulator hones in on your emotional hot buttons, he needs do very little to control you with guilt. …you do it all for him.”



About Susan P

Reader, writer, mother, grandmother, wife, traveler...
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4 Responses to Wherein I Talk About Who’s Pulling Your Strings? by Harriet B. Braiker, Ph.D.

  1. Bethie says:

    🙂 atta girl.

  2. Debbie Morgan says:

    Curious. Does the writer always refer to the manipulator as “she”? Two books that led to my breakthrough, both based on Scripture, Are “Telling Yourself the Truth” and “Boundaries”. Thank you for sharing this one. In order to love our neighbors as ourselves, we must first love ourselves. If we hate ourselves (as we are sometimes “taught” to do) we can only hate others. We must learn to see ourselves as God sees us.

    • Thanks for stopping by and posting, Debbie. The author of the book alternates the pronouns throughout the book. Generally, she does it every other paragraph. I’m very familiar with Boundaries, but don’t know anything about the other book.

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